This afternoon.

Whatever mood you were in doesn't account for the fact that you took my car without permission, you sped off on a street you new our 6 year old was chasing a dog on and you left me the only adult with a sleeping toddler a six year old wherever and the 10 year old in a sarcastic mood. Thank goodness our four year old was content.

You said I was lazy, apathetic and that all I cared about was -wait i didn't hear what the only thing i cared about was, you were slamming stuff around and cursing...am I really supposed to act like you throwing a tantrum at 37?

Everything is back in place, the kids are fed I sent 10 out for 6. They came back and reported that they cleaned off the steps, like you had asked. Was that the initial point of freak out for you? Than you are overworked if that kinda things bothers you to that point. 

They are kids, remember when I told you that earlier as they begged to go to the store and you told them their behavior is too poor for you to take them...yes, i layed down for a few minutes-to gather my thoughts, but since I was working on trying to find something we can do for money. I am sorry that it only appears that I am wasting my time super poking people on Facebook...

Dude, your are so under appreciative. My score= I took off of work to go to see AWK. I knew it would mean more if I stayed home and babysat as you went. I wrote you a smooshy song the other night, so now the three people who look at my blogareas know how squishy I get.

Cut me some FUCKING slack.

She's the DJ

I just returned from our local Magistrate's office. Our financial crisis means that I had to lower the payments on my fines for my five summary offenses. I arrive professionally early am polite as pie as you should, but it wasn't necessary to go out my way since the others waiting were a group of truly anti-socials ghetto guys who were slugging liquor in their pimped out Honda.

The DJ is a 50ish year old woman who has been known to run warm or cold and when I met her after the offenses this summer I was very lucky to find her warm side. She kept me longer to discuss that she had recently decided to step down to become a stay at home mom to her 3 year old. A miracle that her daughter was at her age born and that she couldn't over look that.

Ironically, today was her last day as a judge. I told her good luck and wished her the best luck on her career move. I saw such enthusiasm, not an ounce of fear. I wanted to warn her, but instead, I said we would probably see her at the parks. She said she was very excited about that. I let it go.

I wanted to tell her how little respect the world has for SAHM. That her former title as a JUDGE would not have the same weight in our society. She'd have to tell people she used to be one for the upper middle class 20-30 somethings in the park to even glance her way, otherwise she'd be a grandma, which isn't cool, SAHMs tiptoe around grandmas as if they were teens up to no good. At the park, the cast system set in place. You are judged first by your appearance, then by what kind of cell phone you have. It's an emotional slaughterhouse. 

She may then understand why this can lead to alcohol abuse...one thing, one small item.

Poopy Blues

I have been brainstorming over the past few days, aside from the regular chaos, my mind finds it easier to daydream or write songs rather than make some concrete decisions about our financial problems...Some people who are around me like to tease about how much I use the internet, or how I waste my time otherwise and yeah, maybe I could clean up things around here, maybe I could, but when I am not doing the very least I can in domesticaa, I am cuddling up with the kids and just grinding away. I can't even seem to have fun with them tonight, but yesterday ruled as I took them to the Craft Sunday at our local Art Museum. Everything worked...I liked being in a more urban area again. I am kinda thinking that a lot of the solemn sadness I have is there is nothing much to do in a shit kicker town but raise up yer kids, go to church and drink way too much beer...

The fucking toilet is over flowing too. It always reminds me of my last post partem, that thing used to explode every other day. It was a lot of work to keep things functional for the older three kiddos. I became so infuriated at my partner. Today I just can't deal with poopy water. 

I know I am being cry baby. Later I will peel myself off of this chair and kick ass for the flush! That would be FTF.

www.myspace.com/djlovegood

I'm New Here!

So I have noticed you can't paste anything in here, shame really I was hoping to compile some of my writings and activities here, but now I know this is a starting point!

I am a 33 mother to four amazing children. In between my busy days I like to write about, well whatever comes to mind. It's funny that I usually have a topic of interest before I sit at the keyboard, but I was a little taken back that I couldn't get this site to work in my way.

Xmas 2008